Blogging at Last!

Here I am...blogging at last. I want to start my first post about saying no. I have no problem saying no. I am Southern (from North Carolina) living in Oregon. (My husband is an Oregonian so that's how I ended up here.) I talk so polite and sweet compared to Northwesterners that they take my no's quite well. People keep asking me where I am from and where did I get that accent. My pat reply is "What accent? I talk perfectly normal. Ya'll are the ones with the accent!"

Some, ok many, of my clients, have a problem saying no. They feel guilty and end up overbooking their time, feel pressured and even resenting the task they have taken on.

Here are a few ways to say no without alienating the asker or hurting his/her feelings:

1. Say "I have another commitment." The asker doesn't have to know that your commitment is to watch Biggest Loser, play with your child or have dinner with your spouse. Just say "I have another commitment" and stop.

2. Say "I'm not taking on any new projects right now." You are implying that your schedule is full, but doesn't leave the impression that you just don't want to help.

3. Say "My calendar is full." Being filled means you have scheduled as much as you are willing.